I think I once learned a version that combined the two....
but I couldn't remember it, and it's been bugging me since four or so this afternoon. Anyway, what with the spirit of Halloween in the air (meaning, of course, Octoberfest this evening, where they had caramel apples and hot cider and a chocolate fountain, and both David and Cody won cakes in the cakewalk), I thought it was date-appropriate, if nothing else.



Don't ever laugh as a hearse goes by,
For you may be the next to die.
They wrap you up in a big white sheet,
And cover you up from your head to your feet.
They put you in a big black box,
And cover you up with dirt and rocks.
All goes well for about a week,
And then your coffin begins to leak.
The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out,
The worms play pinochle on your snout.
They eat your eyes, they eat your nose,
They eat the jelly between your toes.
A big green worm with rolling eyes,
Crawls in your stomach and out your eyes.
Your stomach turns a slimy green,
And pus pours out like whipping cream.
You spread it out on a slice of bread,
And that's what you eat when you are dead.


OR


Did you ever think
As the hearse rolls by,
That sooner or later
You're goin' to die,
With your boots a-swingin'
From the back of a roan,
And the undertaking
Inscribin' your stone?

The men with shovels
All stand around
They shovel you in
To that cold, wet ground
They shovel in dirt
Then they throw in rocks
They don't give a hoot
If they break the box.

Oh, the worms crawl in,
And the worms crawl out,
They give a little squirm
And they turn about;
Then each one takes
A bite or two
Of an arm or a leg
Or another part of you!

Oh, your eyes drop out,
And your teeth fall in,
And the worms crawl over
Your mouth and chin;
They bring all their friends,
And their friends' friends, too,
And you're chewed all to bits
When they're through with you!